I'm so sick of trying to be positive. Words can not even begin to describe how much I hate life right now. Fuck everything.
Fuck these doctors, who act as if I'm a junkie and won't even help me with the pain even as it gets exponentially worse. Having cancer is NOT fucking drug seeking behavior you fuucking cunts! If I just wanted drugs I could get them a whole fuck of a lot cheaper than going through this bullshit. Not to mention the fact that I'm terminally fucking ill and they give me a few days paion meds and expect me to somehow make them last 3 fucking weeks. What the fuck! You know what that makes me want to do? See if there's just enough to end this shit.
FUCK. God fucking damnit I'm so fucking angry and frustrated right now. All I want out of life right now is rest and help dealing with this sh it and I can't get either. What the fuck did I do to deserve this? I can accept that things happen for no reason. I've accepted that this. Is going to be a long hard road. Why the fuck can't I get just a little help with it? I'm in hell already.
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